on parenting

this came home with the school newsletter and i thought it was a really good reminder for me to really take time to listen and pay attention to my girls. often, i'm saying "uh, huh" as i'm picking up toys and clothes and walking around, while they are trying to tell me something. that just doesn't seem very nice when i really stop and think about it. it's important, I think, to treat children with respect, just as you would an adult.
so, here's a little something from our school social worker...

On a typical report card, there may be comments about a child's ability to stay focused and pay attention. But what if the report card was grading the adults in children's lives? What if our children were given the opportunity to grade us o the subject of "paying attention?"

What comments might be written?

No parent can give undivided attention to their child at all times. That is both impossible and unreasonable. In our busy, multi-tasking, technology filled work, we are distracted by many things. Work, chores, friends, pets, responsibilities and our own worries all seem to contribute to our distraction. For many, paying focused attention has become a lost skill.

It takes real effort to slow down and to pay really focused attention on our children-the kind of attention that is undivided with no interruptions. Luckily, paying attention doesn't cost a thing, and yet the payoff can be huge.

If you can pay focused attention to your children when they are talking to you about the daily small things that are important to them at that moment, it conveys the message that they are worth it and deserve your utmost attention. When a child feels this, it helps build a strong self-worth and sense of competence. If a child feels and knows this, when the issues are larger, they will turn to you. This message starts when they are young and is so critical as they become teenagers.

Remember, the attention that you are giving your children is going to teach them a lot about you, about their family and about how they should treat other people. Teaching your children to pay undivided attention to people when they talk is a great way to show you value and respect them and teaches them how to relate to others.

So what does your "attention report card" say today?